12 Weeks Out: Reinvention

If there’s one thing I’m not, its complacent. From my career to late-night trolling through edX courses, I always have my next move in the crosshairs, hunting with a permit that never expires.  Its just in my blood. But this week, I found myself, well, not being myself. I was showing signs of being a little too comfortable with the status quo. A little too confident in what I could already do. I needed to snap the hell out of it. And quick. What was the application? Posing practice.

OK – I can see your eyes rolling, but hear me out! To the outsider, posing practice may sound like a silly, narcissistic alliterative phrase. C’mon, its just a bunch of women in sparkling bikinis and sky-high heels, strutting around a gym like they own the place, right? On the surface, sure, one could perceive that. I can tell you that is pretty close to what my perception was before I joined the ranks of the competitor world. But that perception is so disconnected from reality; posing practice is sweat-breaking, confidence-testing, mental endurance training that will ultimately make or break that moment on stage that you prepare months for.  Imagine, you bust your ass for 6 months, eat perfectly according to your nutrition plan, but if you can’t nail it on stage, if you can’t show a handful of judges who you are in a matter of seconds, while standing next to a dozen other equally impressive athletes, you won’t get the results you are looking for. And even if winning a subjectively-earned trophy is not a goal of yours, I promise you, without the confidence of killer posing, you won’t feel like you did yourself justice.

And for me, this isn’t my first rodeo. I feel confident in my posing, I feel like a 5’2″ Beyonce when I walk, I feel like I command an unmistakable presence no matter who is standing next to me. Not because I’m the best (I certainly don’t have a first place trophy to validate that!), but because I am confident as hell in my skin. But here’s the danger I became mindful of this week: I’m not done. I don’t want to walk on stage in April the exact same way that I did one year ago. While I’m sure it would still look and feel great, repetition is mediocre. Reinvention is the opportunity at hand.

And so, I made a conscious decision this week that I’m going to listen. I’m going to listen to my coach, to my uplifting teammates, to my self-filmed posing videos to push the envelope and re-teach myself.  I’m going to break away from the muscle-memory of every turn and start fresh. I’m going to resist the urge to be comfortable. I’m going to treat every single posing practice like its the real deal. Time is a finite resource in this process and I’m not going to waste the handful of minutes I get each week to turn it on. And I’m going to be 100% open to outside accountability – so if you see me slacking Chromies, you better tell me!

Alright, as promised, here’s this week’s stats:

  • Weight: 128lbs (Same as last week)
  • Body fat? I haven’t been tracking this and may not track it at all this season. I know it would be a helpful reference to be able to see my progress over time but I find that focusing on this number distracts me mentally and so….I don’t 🙂
  • Training: 3-4x week with my coach
  • Cardio: Only 15min, 3x per week.
  • Mood Rating (1-10, 10=BAMF): 8 – two weeks in and I’m feeling good! I’m less “impatient” than I was last week. Although my stats would suggest I haven’t had much change week over week, I certainly feel the difference. Maybe its just in my head, but even if it is, that’s the most important place for it to be. I feel high energy and high motivation to take on another week!

Finally, my progress pic from Week 2! 12 weeks til the stage!

12 weeks out